Talk Back

Rob Hill Sr. Is an Expert, but He’s Not Perfect

Known as “The Heart Healer,” Rob Hill Sr. has branded himself as the relationship expert to quote.

And I mean that literally. If you scroll down your timeline on any social media platform, you will see at LEAST one, or five, of his quotes related to love, healing and/or self empowerment.

Needless to say, folks are talking about him one way or another.

But this time around, Hill isn’t a trending topic because of his world-class words of wisdom.

People are straight up slamming buddy following reports that he secretly married and divorced former Destiny’s Child group member LeToya Luckett in just two months:

Harsh much?

During an appearance on WKYS’s The Fam in the Morning, hosts DJ Quicksilva and Lil Mo wasted no time addressing the rumors.

When asked if he was marrying LeToya, the Heart Healer gave the following response:

“Toya and I…we’re not getting married at this point because we understand each other as friends and there’s certain things I need to do over here. And we realize we can’t do that together right now.”

Allegedly, the two were married already, but kept their status under wraps. Later on in the interview, Lil Mo reminded Hill that he is “perfect” in the eyes of the outside world, and that the breakup immediately brings his choice in career into question.

“You do realize the outside world thinks you’re perfect,” Lil Mo said. “So when you say maybe a situation like that, they say ‘Wait a minute. Mr. Heart Healer and he ain’t even damn married!'”

“What is perfect?,” Hill asked. “What people don’t understand about love is that romance is such a small facet of it. Who we date….how we date…that’s such a small facet of love right? Romance is very small. Aside from that, relationships are not easy…the thing that happens sometimes in my relationships is I’m great at picking awesome women. As I grow, it’s not always the same as picking the right one for me. I’ve never given my love and didn’t make a life long friend. I’ve never loved someone and broken them.”

Newsflash: being married doesn’t make you an expert in love, it makes you married. There are plenty of people who are married who I would NEVER take advice from. My guess is that you can think of a few too.

My advice to you is simple. Does what Rob, or anyone else, who talks about love make sense? If yes, carry on, enjoy and extract the lesson. If no, keep it moving.

As a love and relationship writer, nothing annoys me more than the unappointed pedestal of “perfection” that people place you on. In fact, this is the very reason why I don’t A) discuss my current relationship status, and B) call myself an expert. The judgments are limitless.

It seems like love is the only profession where you’re not allowed to “fail.” No, it’s probably not a good idea to take advice from a broke person if you’re trying to get rich– unless you want to learn how not to be broke by doing what they didn’t do. And no, you probably shouldn’t listen to someone who has had a string of unsuccessful relationships. But to judge someone based on a relationship not working out simply because they write about love doesn’t make much sense either.

We do not write about love and relationships to give off an air of superiority or perfection. We do it because many of us, well at least I know this is true for me, have been called to do so. Being a relationship “expert” does not absolve Hill–or anyone for that matter–of being human. It does not mean that he will not make mistakes and will have an easier time in a relationship.

Being a relationship “expert” simply means that he’s lived, he’s learned and he’s bold enough to share the lessons learned along the way.

I do not know what happened with Rob and LeToya. But what I do know is that relationships fail regardless of how well you arm yourself with the proper knowledge. You can set yourself up to win in love, hell in life as much as possible, but if it just is not in the cards, then a certain relationship won’t be yours no matter what you do.

Social media is coming down on Hill for making a decision to exit a relationship that was not good for him or LeToya at the time. They are criticizing him for not being able to “make his relationship work.” But what many fail to realize is that, sometimes, leaving IS making it work. It is being wise enough to know when to call it quits while saving yourself time and pain in the process.

In terms of losing his credibility? Hill had this to say.

“My spirit knows what it knows. I just trust myself to write it out in book form.”

Keep doing you, Rob.