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The Problem I have With Amazon’s “Prime Wardrobe”

An open letter to the person who steals packages. 

Amazon just announced “Prime Wardrobe,” a new function that will allow shoppers to try on all online clothing orders before purchasing. But the problem I have with this new feature is that it doesn’t account for pesky package stealers.

Amazon Wardrobe will be for people with Prime Memberships. It would ship free merch to shoppers in efforts to entice shoppers to buy. Shoppers would have 30 days to send back or buy the product at a discounted rate. This will be super convenient for shoppers who live in doorman – guarded apartment buildings or in single home areas. But for city dwellers who live in sketchy areas or have pesky neighbors, this could be a headache.

Attn: People who live in apartments without concierge are at a lost.

For city dwellers, apartments that don’t come with a nosy doormen will be exposed pesky package stealers and will have to deal with the United States Post Service even more. UPS is also horrible with their hard-to- read notices and late deliveries. My monthly flower subscription wasn’t left at my door because I wasn’t home. But sending flowers to a factory for weekend processing, is annoying AF.  Some USPS offices sort Amazon packages in a “special room” and have special processing steps. Because the USPS service is a severely underfunded government agency,  there aren’t even enough drivers in some US regions to deliver these “special orders.” And for people who aren’t home all day, it’s a headache. The post office isn’t even open after 5pm! And I know what you’re going to say, “can’t you just get the Doorman app?” No, I am not paying extra delivery fees.

Amazon Wardrobe’s tagline is “giving you the freedom to try before you buy…”  But what happens when the clothes never make it to your doorstep?!

It is common knowledge to people who do not have a doormen to experience what I’m calling package anxiety. This is the feeling that online shoppers get when their package is lost in the USPS mail ‘s purple hole or just lost in general. Although many businesses will side with the customer when this happens, shoppers just want their roku stick or panties from Frederick’s of Hollywood.

Pesky package stealers.

Pesky Package stealers are so wack and obviously have no class. Under the law, mail theft can result in a fine or jail time of up to five years. But people are obviously ignoring the laws these days because package stealing is far too common… at least in my social circles.  Although, Amazon.com  is solving a major online shopping dilemma, it is a disaster waiting to happen and a field of candy for pesky package stealers.

File this under: Things to Consider.