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Stomping the Yard: Dating While in College

Everyone is looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right. Even in college, when you have to worry about classes, exams and essays, usually, you want to make time to find your soulmate. Let’s face it. College may be one of the best places to meet that special someone. In college, you are (usually) unattached and free to be yourself and learn new things. I met my husband in college and we’ve been together for more than 20 years. It was one of the best and smartest decisions I’ve ever made.

If you decide to date during your higher education experience, keep these few tips in mind:

Explore. Take your time and meet as many people as possible. Don’t settle on one person too quickly. And most of all, have fun!

Keep things low maintenance. When finding someone that interests you, go out for coffee or tea between classes. This will make it easy to get away if he is a creep.

Opt for daytime outings. Dating late at night can give the wrong impression and may lead to some unsafe situations. Also, choose a place that won’t be frequented by a bunch of your classmates. I always say be discreet about who you are dating, until there is a title on your relationship.

Go digital. Online dating is a great way to meet new people while in college. One of the most innovative and contemporary dating sites, if I do say so myself, is PiQ.Dating. This site allows you to only see your potential date after you have viewed his or her personality traits and interests. This allows for a more comprehensive analysis of the person, rather than basing your opinion on looks alone.

Be yourself. You want to find a person that’s compatible with your true self, not with someone you are pretending to be. There is nothing wrong with putting your best foot forward, however don’t be fake. The “real you” will come out anyway.

Take it slow. Rome was not built in a day. Take your time to get to know him or her, and put limits on the amount of time you spend with them initially. Let them miss you.

Talk less; listen more. Ask open-ended questions and ask the questions you really want to know. I like to get the deal-breaker questions out of the way early on, but save topics such as religion and politics for later. Sometimes, the wrong topic of conversation can start you off on an awkward foot. People are passionate about their beliefs and you don’t want to offend anyone on the first date.

Remember that dating can be exciting and fun. Keep things casual and date as many people as you like. However, make sure you come up with a plan for your long-term relationship goals. I often talk about treating your love life as a business. Consider college a period for market research as you prepare for the ultimate merger.

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Dr. Heavenly Kimes is a dentist, TV personality and author of The Business of Love, available at www.DrHeavenly.com.