Oprah ‘Super Soul Sunday’ Recap

Yesterday on Super Soul Sunday, Oprah spoke with relationship writer Tracy McMillan, author of Why You’re Not Married…Yet, about the spiritual path of relationships.

McMillan, if you’re not familiar, wrote an article called “Why You’re Not Married,” one of the most-viewed articles ever on The Huffington Post. The author shared what she believes are the spiritual aspects of love, and why our ability to love ourselves is key to loving someone else.

Full disclosure: I’m a fan of McMillan. When her book landed on my desk while I was working at Cosmo, I was intrigued. Homegirl turned an article into a book! I searched for her post online, read it, and knew I had to give her book a full-read. McMillan’s straight-talk about relationships is what makes her advice resonate with so many single women.

It’s filled with nothing but the truth. She may have one too many failed marriages (three to be exact), but as you learn from her, with failure comes great lessons.

The episode opens up with McMillan discussing her aforementioned failed relationships. Oprah admittedly says she at first didn’t know why someone with McMillan’s relationship history should be considered an expert. But the ever so wise media mogul noted, “Every so-called failure is there to teach you more about who you are. And if you pay attention, you get better and better. Failure is a mighty teacher.”

The show covered a lot of the issues we all face in relationships today. But it got down to the ugly truth of it: Your relationship is often a reflection of what you think about yourself. A daunting realization. So the ugly you may see in your relationship may be what you believe about yourself. McMillan says: “Look at it and say, ‘If that’s what I believe, what do I need to change about the way I’m loving myself.'”

The writer then went on to list a series of questions you should ask yourself if your relationship isn’t going well:

1. “Where do I need to love myself more?”

2. “What am I here to learn?”

3. “What is it that I believe about myself that this situation is showing me?”

4. “What can I do about it?”

According to McMillan, relationships (especially marriages) “are a spiritual journey. The world’s most intense yoga.” Take the first step on this journey by watching the full episode below:

About Dara Adeeyo


Dara is a freelance writer, nail art addict, and uncertified Beyoncé expert. She loves a good workout, but also love eating Nutella out of the jar. Follow her daily adventures on Facebook or Twitter @dadeeyo