No Blackface. Period.

Updated on Oct. 31:  And if you don’t know, now you know… Caitlin Cimeno who posted this Trayvon Martin mockery on her Instagram just got canned.  Apparently, she also had some choice words for Black Girls Rock.  Read the full story HERE courtesy of Black Youth Project. And seriously, cool all the way out with the blackface.  

Uh uh, non-Black people.

trayvon costume

You really are going too far.  Please see egregious Exhibit A above.  Does this joker (right) above have a soul under that black sweatshirt?  Does Mr. Shoe Polish Face (left) have any human sense behind that stupid-looking smirk? And not so sexy Robin Hood…what the hell are you doing co-signing for this insensitive Trayvon Martin-mocking madness? This just in, courtesy of Gawker, the identities of these awful individuals HERE.  Please note that William Filene, the one dressed as Trayvon, is an actual hooligan who was arrested for felony autho theft, according to Gawker, whereas Trayvon was merely walking home from a convenience store and did nothing wrong.  But who wants to bet if the real-life Zimmerman would actually have thought this dude (sans shoe polish) was a prowler?

**wall slides**

I realize that Halloween is one of the most wonderful and magical nights of the year for a lot of grown folk, including myself, but there are some limits to assuming an alter ego for the night.

The first rule of costume club is the ONLY rule of costume club.

No skin darkening to look Black.  Ever.

And please understand that NONE of the below is an adequate excuse….

1.  “Marlon and Shawn Wayans wore whiteface.”

Okay, those are two actors who by no means represent for, nor took a poll from, the totality of Blackness before they put that light mess on their faces, donned blonde lacefronts and tried to be Paris and Nicky Hilton.  And if you’re mad at the brothers Wayans, by all means, direct your anger toward them.  They are both on Twitter.  And it doesn’t help your even-stevens case that the movie came out almost TEN years ago, and there was no sequel.  But if you want to trip on their so-called reverse racist antics, do not forget to get at Eddie Murphy who also mocked y’all on “Saturday Night Live” a long time ago when he went undercover to experience White privilege…. Give Mr. Murphy what for, unless you think he was punished enough by starring in “Pluto Nash” and “A Thousand Words.”

2.  “We live in post-racial America.”

No the hell we don’t…and even if we did, wouldn’t that mean race wouldn’t matter?  So if you wanted to look like your favorite rapper, singer, actress, etc., you could without swagger jacking the melanin.  Julianne Hough, I liked you before you went and did this dummy move (below).  And just so you know: Rather than looking like Crazy Eyes I now dub thee Crazy Arse.  Blackface is not the new black.  Twitter apology not accepted.  Moving on…


3. ” I asked my Black friends and they were cool with it.”

News flash…there is no center command for Black America.  Even President Barack Obama cannot pardon you for this infraction.  So don’t waste your time getting permission slips from potentially self-hating  African American fools who think it’s funny you are trying to be Lil Wayne complete with faux locs and shoe polish.  Because unless they plan to form a human shield around your raggedy behind all night, you are better off not asking their advice.

4.  “My other White friends are doing it.”

I’ll refer you back to what your parents, grandparents, great grandparents, and ancestors have been saying since parents first started raising children.  If your dumb friends all jumped off a cliff, would you do it?  Nah?  I didn’t think so.  And don’t think you’re slick because you are attending an (ahem) homogenous Halloween party.  See the two stupid photos above and consider all the social media outings you could face the second you step on the scene.  **Liam Neeson voice** We will find you. And boom, we did.  Thanks Gawker!

5.  “I did not use shoe polish, so it’s really more like tan face.”

Unless you are portraying a Hawaiian Tropic model, Snooki from “Jersey Shore,”  or George Hamilton (aka a tanned White woman or man) you have ZERO business ever altering your skin for Halloween.  Oh wait, exceptions are made if you are trying to be a (green) elf, (blue) smurf or (red) devil.  And even in those cases, if a real-life elf, smurf or demon asks you to stop, please do.

Thanks, and Happy Halloween!