JET Love

Love Advice From Your Best Friend

I have a best friend who swears she is my significant other. She expects her phone calls to be answered in a timely fashion. She believes that access to me should be exclusive to only her. Anytime she notices any other woman getting too comfortable, she is guaranteed to be on the phone reminding me that there is no room for other women in my life.

While we find humor in her “pretend” jealousy, an envious and controlling partner is a reality than many of us have or are currently living in. My friends have been instrumental in my ability to bounce back from devastation. Unable to protect us from the destruction ahead, many of our friends are tired of having to watch us unmercifully succumb to unfurling, unhealthy relationships.

We don’t always want to hear what our friends have to say, despite knowing they have our best interest at heart. I’m here to say those very things that your closest companion wishes you would acknowledge.

When you’re involved with an unsupportive partner…

Do you hesitate to tell your aspirations to your partner because you know that they will either downplay your ideas or make you question yourself? Any person who robs you of your confidence and fails to encourage your efforts to better your life has the potential to stunt your growth. When your lover steals your joy, your friend is forced to rebuild what he/she has left in ruins.

When you’re in an unrewarding relationship…

Your friend may be tired of hearing you ask yourself, “Why am I even with him/her?”

You have nothing in common. You don’t enjoy each other’s company. This relationship is more work that reward.  You’ve advanced over the years and this individual has not only stayed in the same place, but has no desire to change their conditions or behaviors. If time and obligation is the only reason you are maintaining this relationship, let it go. It’s perfectly OK to move away from anything or anyone who does not add value to your life, even if that person is your spouse.

Your partner drains you…

Does your partner find a way to take the joy out of everything? Is he or she a person who can instantly drain all the life out of the room the moment they enter?  Everything from your partner’s mouth is depressing, dark, and discouraging. You can hardly stand to be in this person’s company because by the time you leave, you hate everything about your life too. You then take his or her negative vibes and emotions and dump them on your friends. Energy is too powerful to constantly sacrifice the good vibes you have by being around a draining person. Let them come out of their misery.

You’re in a relationship that is unequally yolked…

Relationships should be equally yoked, but our friendships should be as well. When your friends tell you someone is not good enough for you, it’s wise to take into consideration what they are saying. Unless you have a history of a friend whose advice should constantly be scrutinized, assume they’re looking out for you.

Jazz Keyes New Image

Jazz Keyes is a community activist, poetess and a nationally certified Life Purpose and Career Coach. Keyes supplies clients with the necessary tools and techniques to awaken their divine energy, heal their open wounds and create an aura of love, compassionate and tranquility. In 2013,  Keyes was named “13 People to Watch For” by Rockford Register Star and in honor of Black History Month 2014, Keyes was recently named a“Neighborhood Hero” by ComEd’s Power of One Campaign. Keyes in currently pursuing her Masters in Clinical Psychology and hopes to one day be a best-selling author and motivational speaker. She has devoted a great deal of her time and energy on mastering the art of communication in order to create healthy, dynamic, long-lasting relationships.