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JET Love

3 Keys to Bringing Up An Issue

Let’s face it. Every day is not a pleasant walk in the park. Many of us have a hard time tackling our own life issues, so when you seek to do so with someone else, obstacles will certainly arise.

When it comes to bringing up issues in your relationship, you must be aware of when you decide to do so. Here are a few tips to help you successfully bring up conflict in your relationship.

1) Determine why you are bringing the issue up.

It is important to keep in mind the purpose of why you want to share your concern. Ideally, you should yearn to share your concern in hopes that your partner can better understand your position. Will resolving the issue create harmony in your relationship? Or will it cause further disruption? Having a clear understanding of your why will help you to zero in on what you wish to communicate.

2) Consider if this is the right time to discuss the topic at hand.

Does your partner have a major event coming up within the next twenty four hours, such as an interview, audition or big work presentation? If so, it’s probably best not to bring up points of contention. Waiting until your mate is mentally, physically and emotional available will not only show them that you care about what they have going on, but it will also maximize your chances of being heard.

3) Prepare for the worse possible outcome.

Figuring out how you’re going to address your concerns with your mate is just one part of the equation. You must also be ready for their reaction. Prepare for the worst case scenario, and be willing to navigate through it. If you’re both committed to improving your relationship, then a disagreement should be something the two of you can handle.

When you are expressing your feelings, remember the end goal. You must accept the fact that he or she may not agree with your point of view. Just as a restaurant’s presentation adds to the enjoyment and leaves a lasting impression on the guest, similarly, you want your partner to feel respected and handled with the utmost care.

Remember: Use communication as a positive bridge for your relationship, not a point of division.

Justin photo

Justin L. Mabrie, MBA, is a graduate of Hampton University and native Houstonian. He provides relationship advice based on a traditional yet fresh perspective. Currently living in Qatar, varied aspects of dating are explored through his writings. You may keep up with him through Instagram @jlmabrie