‘Scandal’ Recap: Don’t Touch the First Ladies

This week’s episode of Scandal opens with Olivia and the president arguing like an old married couple. Oh, the irony. Liv has a date with Jake and Fitz is in his feelings about it. He doesn’t trust Jake with his sidepiece, but Liv makes it clear that this isn’t about him. She needs to make the rumors go away and if using Jake will help, then so be it. Translation: Move around Fitz.

Next, we catch a quick glimpse of Harrison and Adnan recovering from their *ahem* reunion. She couldn’t let Harrison’s afterglow fade before assigning him to another mission. Harrison reluctantly declines. So Adnan reminds him who wears the pants. Read: ClearWater. I don’t know what kind of Middle Eastern spices Adnan is packing in her hot pocket, but as soon as they hit Whole Foods, I’m buying.

Meanwhile, Publius is tipping off some messy news reporter who’s now running around D.C. leaking stories of supposed drug use in the governor’s mansion way back when Fitz ran California. We initially think the drugs belong to his new VP running mate/former lieutenant governor Andrew, but find out later that the pills were actually first lady Mellie’s. Apparently, Andrew saved her from an overdose and attempted sucide after she was raped by Fitz’s father.

”We are Not the Same”
Back at the White House, the first lady vs. first mistress battle is heating up and I’m here for every minute of it. Olivia discovers that the drugs were Mellie’s, confronts her about her relationship with Andrew and tells her to cut it out. It went a little something like this:

Olivia: Stop cheating on my boyfriend or we won’t win the election.

Mellie: Well isn’t this the pot calling the kettle a whore? WE. ARE. NOT. THE. SAME. I never cheated. Bye, Felicia.

…Or something like that. Next thing you know, Mellie is slapping a big fat kiss on Andrew in the White House under the watchful eye of the former first ladies. Mellie’s got her groove back and I’m not mad at her. This is overdue. Fitz can’t have all the fun.

“I’m Violent Now”
Even after last week’s verbal spanking, Liv still maintains her naive concern for her father. They meet for dinner, she cries about being afraid for him, he shuts her down…again. She’s clearly a glutton for punishment.

Storming out of the restaurant, she finds Quinn’s spying on her. They have this Facts Of Life moment as Liv pleads with her to “come home.” Then, Quinn pulls out a gun, mutters some nonsense about being gangster and tells Liv to exit stage left or else.

“You’ve Got The Juice Now, Jake”
Jake finally gets his B613 “care package” and learns that there’s a secret B613 agent working in the White House. After a long day of top secret shenanigans, Jake goes home to his fake girlfriend to have fake sex and has a real fit. He’s tired and he’s hungry. But clearly Liv’s government assistance hasn’t kicked in yet, because there’s no food in the fridge. Jake’s not having it. If he’s going to play the role, he’s going to get the benefits. No Liv, “Popcorn is not food. Stock your damn fridge” and make Jake a steak.

Is it just me or is Liv being “handled” by everyone this season?

Elsewhere, Cyrus’s husband, James aka Publius is not about this life. David gets kidnapped by his girlfriend, who basically saves his life, on his way to meet with the D.C. reporter about what really happened to Sally’s husband. We also find out that Mama Pope has teamed up with Adnan. Things are about to get juicy! And by juicy I mean, BLOODY!

Is Fitz’s first born really his son or his little brother? Are Adnan and Momma Pope Lovers? Will Quinn graduate from potty training to B613 Pull-Ups? Let us know what you think in the comments!

About Kiki Camille


Kiki Camille is a Chicago native, member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority Inc. and DePaul University alumnus. The self-proclaimed “pop culture private eye” launched the Chicago-based entertainment/gossip blog Nosey Girl in 2011. Stay tuned every week for Kiki’s Scandal recaps. You can also follow her on Twitter and Instagram at @KikiCamille and @NoseyGirlTweets.