R. Kelly Fans Petition For New National Anthem

Wait for it…

R. Kelly’s fans seriously want Obama’s White House Administration to change the country’s traditional National Anthem to “Ignition (Remix).” Let that sink in for a little bit.

Yeah, so…usually when people think of the United States, red, white and blue, bald eagles and even gun violence comes to mind. But this is er…new.

According to The Urban Daily, part of the petition reads as follows:
WE PETITION THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TO: change the national anthem to R. Kelly’s 2003 hit “Ignition (Remix).”We, the undersigned, would like the Obama administration to recognize the need for a new national anthem, one that even a decade after its creation, is still hot and fresh out the kitchen. America has changed since Francis Scott Key penned our current anthem in 1814. Since then, we have realized that after the show, it’s the afterparty, and that after the party, it’s the hotel lobby, and–perhaps most importantly–that ’round about four, you’ve got to clear the lobby, at which point it’s strongly recommended that you take it to the room and freak somebody. President Obama: we ask you to recognize the evolution of this beautiful country and give us an anthem that better suits the glorious nation we have become.

This definitely isn’t a joke and we need you to slap some sense into your cousins, please and thank you.