Watching VH1’s series Mob Wives gives me angina.
Every episode seems like you’re just moments away from watching someone’s face off— or be ripped off. Still, I watch. Judge me. And a recent episode had me wondering about my own stance regarding friendship. One of the characters, Renee, a pill-poping, plastic surgery-indulging former mob princess, tells Carla, her frenemy (yes, they have them and they’re in their 40’s), that she can no longer stomach pleasantries because the latter is known for sleeping with married men. But Carla’s fatal flaw isn’t simply being a sought after jump off; it’s not knowing who to take the leap with. Allegedly.
According to Renee, Carla flirted with her friend’s hubby, making it clear that she was a “go-to girl” (read: slut). Carla claims the guy was pining over her and she tried to ward him off to no avail. My issue, or question, is should a woman’s personal choices impact your ability to maintain a friendship? My initial instinct was yes. My mind auto directs to the saying drummed into my head as a child, “birds of a feather…”. Plus, I firmly ascribe to the mantra that you should adhere to the moral compass a person show’s you they possess when dealing with others as a guideline as to how they’ll treat you.
But my men friends feel differently. One specifically noted that guys do not judge other men for being whorish. The acknowledge that each person he entertains has free will and both elect to engage in sordid behavior. In addition, they know that if their woman choses to step out it’s on her, not simply him.
Admittedly, the world has double standard for male and female behavior. It is acceptable for men to sleep around while it is not for women to openly do so— aside from The Jersey Shore. So it’s no wonder that Renee focused her rage on Carla, and not her friend’s husband, for their unseemly interaction.
Even with my insight into fairness and double standards, I’m not sure whether I’m team Renee or Carla on this issue. If a person steals from others, they may steal from you— but they might not. Many people honor friendship above all else. In the big picture, I guess everyone has to decide who they respect enough to let, and keep, in their lives. On the small screen, this is just another issues for the ladies to slap box about.