Keeping it 140: Donald Trump, Binder Full of Twigots, Marcus Vick and More
Welcome to Keeping it 140. I’m Kyra Kyles, a Senior Editor at JET who moonlights as a social media stalker, tracking the good, bad and ugly of online sharing. I’ll mostly be taking celebs and public figures to task for gaffes on the Interwebs (I see you, 50 Cent and Chris Brown.) But I’ll also offer advice on how we civilians can keep it together on sites like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and… um… MySpace, that is, if you’re still lurking around on the latter outlet. Just think of me as the Emily Post of posting.
Whew. I’m still struggling to recover after a nail-biter of an Election Day. But fight on, I must, particularly since I know that I have been elected to present you with a round-up of social media stooges who need to have a colosseum full of seats.
Revolution Will Not Be Televised (Nor Should Celebrity Apprentice)
Mark these words. Or just bold them. I will NEVER ever watch anything produced by, featuring or co-signed for by Donald Trump again. The already wholly unlikable and clearly dimwitted mogul has already earned a permanent pop culture timeout from me, due to his thinly veiled bigotry a la Birtherism. But his clownish conduct AFTER President Barack Obama earned a second term takes the damn cake, plus the icing. No this Hair Club for Men member did NOT call for revolution in the streets. He took the panic-inciting Tweets down, but thankfully sites, including Salon.com captured them in their entirety. It is seriously time for us to turn this dude’s mic off and insist he leave the stage for good. Even his fellow NBC-er, Brian Williams agrees. Go, Brian!
Rise of the Twigots
The election brought the ugliness out of regular people too. Among the Average Joe/Jane online idiotic acts, we can add the #votewhite Twitter trend, not to be outdone by its #voteblack counterpart. But the highest award for buffoonery and bigotry, goes to unabashedly biased teens who got a rude awakening about that avatar life when their racist, awful Tweets were aggregated by Jezebel (thanks, Jez) and traced back to their respective schools and officials announced plans to put them in all new kinda Fail Whale category. And please do, try and resist following these regrettable human beings on Twitter and cussing them all the way back to the Stone Ages. (I’m still struggling with it, but so far, so good.)
Typically, the Tweets of a spoiled and grammatically challenged billionaire spawn would not net my notice. But I must devote a full treatment to Peter Brant II, son of powerful publisher Peter Brant Sr. and former Victoria’s Secret supermodel Stephanie Seymour. This piece of refuse in the making had the raw audacity to post to Instagram that a possible solution to being rendered “poor” by the President’s re-election was to kill him. And no, the “ha ha ha” to follow did not downgrade the seriousness of his statement. I second New York Magazine writer Hillary Moss’s contention (paraphrased) that ish will get real for this brat when the Secret Service comes a knocking on his door.
You Mad, Bro?
Alright, enough election stuff. I can feel my blood pressure rising. Let’s turn to less harmful public rants, like that of Michael Vick’s brother. Marcus dahling decided to go IN on the Philadelphia Eagles organization en masse after the team’s embarrassing performance during Monday night’s football game. At one point, he pleaded: “Please trade my brother. We requesting out of Philly!!!! Please please please,”
As a big sister, I know what it’s like to defend your sibling, but man, come on. Don’t make your own brother lose his job. Even Michael wasn’t feeling the family intervention, and made his brother apologize. Next step: Get him to actually, factually forever delete that account or at least, stay away from any form of technology during game time.
Hey, I love calamari and I do enjoy octopus in my sushi, but one hunter-and-gathering goon took his love for seafood 10,000 leagues too far.This stone cold moron gained notoriety this week for dragging an octopus out of the sea, throwing it into his truck bed (despite the protests of fellow divers) and then taking macabre pictures of the beast slowly dying on his garage floor. Check the evidence from KOMO-TV. And then he underscores his error by posting about it on Facebook. Is it a wonder after his social media malarkey that there are people calling for his head? And he ate the thing for dinner after all this? Don’t this boy know about that PETA? **smacks own forehead and walks out of room**
And now, introducing my fave viral video of the week. This here is a “struggle” live shot. Watch as my man tries and fails to figure out who the rather famous Black celebrity is standing just feet from him. And the way the two anchors support him is admirable, but as a former full-time TV reporter, I’m guessing my man got quite a talking to when he brought his clueless, pop culture foolywang self back to the studio.