As the staff’s resident relationship guru—who’s carved out a space on the web with an award-winning site called Naked With Socks On—I’ve been tapped by JET’s EIC to offer up dating advice and perspective each week for our readers. Five days out of the week I’m slaving behind a desk as JET’s Managing Editor, so I look forward to exploring the sights and sounds of Chicago with my wife as part of our weekly outings. I am Anslem Samuel Rocque and this is Date Knight.
As odd as it may sound to most, a lot of people need training on how to date—effectively. Anyone can land a first outing with someone of the opposite sex if they play their cards right, but the hard part is scoring a second. It kills me every time I see someone shoot themselves in the foot before a courtship can truly blossom.
Such was the case the other day when my wife and I were out enjoying one of the final weekends of summer and grabbed brunch at Chicago’s famous Yolk. As we were enjoying our meal I couldn’t help but notice a young man to my right sitting by himself talking on his cell phone. At first I thought he was spending quality time with himself and was merely shooting the breeze before placing his order. But then a young lady joined him.
Still, the young man’s whispered mobile conversation continued, while his lady friend sat across from him unattended to. Then, to add insult to injury, he pulled out a second phone and began texting someone else. Now, I understand the constantly-connected world that we now live in but there’s a time and a place for everything. Enjoying the company of an attractive woman is neither the time nor the place to multitask. (Not to mention the fact that a true gentleman let’s a woman have the bench while he takes the outside seat.)
Eventually Mr. Important ended his call and text session, but the damage had been done. His lady friend looked disinterested and mentally checked out. I have no way of knowing for sure if this guy had serious business to do on a Saturday morning, but there’s a certain level of respect you have to give a person that chooses to spend time with you. Excusing oneself to handle “business” outside or simply letting it wait until later would have been better options in that scenario than to ignore the person you chose to take out to brunch.
It’s not cool. It’s just plain rude. And in the end those are the people that wind up alone with their texts, two phones and the check.
What’s the rudest thing that someone’s done while on a date? Did you offer them a second shot or did their oversight end the courtship? What makes a perfect first date for you?
Speak your piece…